How to get a toddler to sleep in a bed.

Rebekah has been struggling with naps because she has learned how to climb out of her crib and wouldn't stay in her bed. Although she stays in her bed just fine at night, probably because it's dark. Finally on Monday after not napping she was so tired that she had a hard time sleeping (don't ask why, but when my kids get over-tired they don't sleep.) She kept me up half the night on Monday night. So, Tuesday I decided she had to take a nap. After she played for an hour I prayed about what to because nothing was working and I was getting frustrated. I didn't want another sleepless night because she wouldn't nap again. After praying, I felt like I should go in there and sit with her, ignore her, but put her back in bed each time she sat up. I did that and she was out in 20 minutes. I felt bad ignoring Hyrum while I did it, though. Wednesday, she wouldn't stay in bed at naps again and I couldn't stay in there because Hyrum was fussy and needed me. I tried, but he kept screaming. So, I decided that each time she got out of her bed I would take something away. (One of her sleeping items: baby, water cup, extra pillow, favorite blanket, etc.) Finally I was down to her last item, and I wasn't sure what to do. Then it came to me- I warned her that if she got out of bed again I would have to buckle her in her car seat for a nap. I closed her door and went to get her car seat. Sure enough in a minute or two she was out of bed again. So, I buckled her in her car seat gave her a blanket that she doesn't necessarily like and left. She screamed for about 5 minutes and fell asleep. I wasn't sure I liked restraining her to get her to sleep, but something had to be done for my sanity as well as hers. The next day, Thursday, I took down her crib in the morning because it wasn't doing any good anyway. Then, at naps I told her the same story. If you get out of bed I'll have to take your things away, when everything's gone you're going to have to be buckled in your car seat. So, that day I ended up taking her water cup, baby, favorite blanket, and extra pillow. But, that was it. She stayed in her bed after that and fell asleep. On Friday I told her the same story, and -she proved to be a pretty smart two year old.- she didn't get out of bed once! She realized she got to keep her stuff if she stayed in bed. Saturday and today I didn't have to take anything away either. I'm glad I didn't have to use the car seat method again. And I'm glad she's back to her normal sleeping patterns.

Sleep, need more sleep!

Actually we haven't been doing too bad. I've been averaging about 5-6 hours a night and Timothy's been averaging about 4-5 (He stays up and does homework all hours of the night sometimes.) Hyrum is actually a pretty good sleeper. He's used to sleeping for 6-8 hours stretches. It's Rebekah that has been giving us the trouble. Lately she's decided that she wants to be held while she sleeps, and have a bottle each time she stirs. She screams like something's really wrong every night until we finally try the bottle and she falls asleep in minutes. When we lay her in her bed one of two things happens, she either sleeps through it or she wakes up and begins screaming all over again. If she stays asleep during the transfer then, she'll sleep for 5-25 minutes and then want another bottle again to fall back asleep- back patting, rocking, and singing are not acceptable methods of falling asleep anymore. I've been reading a book about toddler adoption and they say to never leave a newly adopted toddler alone to cry because then they will learn they can't trust you. So, we've been giving into her rants and raves for three weeks now. Well, that is changing as of today.

I decided that I need to stop trying to parent the way this book is telling me to because my instinct is telling me different. At nap time today is when I decided. After a nearly sleepless night last night I was tired and so was Rebekah. So, I decided to put her down for a nap early. I started at 11:00am. I rocked her with a bottle and she was asleep by 11:15am. So, then I rocked her until 11:30 just to make sure she was "out" before laying her down. (This was all at the expense of attention for Brigham and Hyrum. ) So, I laid her down at 11:30 and she promptly starting screaming. Patting her just made her more mad. I could hear Hyrum screaming in the other room and Brigham needed lunch soon before his nap so I left her. As I got the boys lunch and got them down for naps I thought and thought while Rebekah screamed in her crib. I was trying to decide if I was doing the right thing. Finally, I decided that she needed to learn to soothe herself. It's an important skill and the sooner she learned it the sooner we could all enjoy more sleep-including her. So, I did what I have seen and heard recommended. I went in about every 15minutes to let her know that I was there and loved her. I patted her back even though she just got more mad because she wanted to be picked up. Finally, at 1:40pm she fell asleep.

Tonight wasn't quite so bad. We told her ahead of time that she would be laid down in bed and expected to soothe herself to sleep. I told her and I had Timothy tell her so that she knew Daddy wouldn't come rescue her. Then, she screamed for only 40 minutes! I put her down at 7:05pm and I went in at 7:10, 7:20, 7:35 (by recommendation from a website to make the time a bit longer each time) By 7:45 she was "out" and she's slept soundly now for 2 hours so far! I hope she continues to improve and I hope she doesn't feel abandoned.

Here's Brigham and Hyrum sleeping too. They already know how to self-soothe. They both suck their middle two fingers! It's funny!

Hyrum moved in permanently on Tuesday, February 17th! Today he is 4 months old! What a handsome fellow!